Background

Hi all,
I know I just wrote, but I find I feel very cramped and confined in my house. My brain still hasn't recovered completely from school, but I miss school soooo MUCH! The academics are honestly something I wouldn't be able to handle right now, but I miss my dance classes. I want school to start just for that reason, I'll take the brain-bashing part just fine, so long as I can dance every day afterwards. I haven't really kept up with my hours of exercise I was doing before school let out, and I'm loosing weight because of it. I hate fickle bodies! (note: not bodies, just the fickleness of them) I also think I wouldn't mind actually going on dates my senior year, now that I'm single it's totally plausible, but probably not probable. I adore hanging out with my friends though. I probably wouldn't be writing today if it weren't for the fact that I "helped" my uncle and his family move instead of going to one of my friends' houses. Though I have to admit, when I told my dad I wouldn't be of any use, I wasn't expecting to spend almost two hours sitting in an empty master bedroom waiting for my pants to dry. (more on that next time, maybe.) But alas I did, and all that after getting up early to clean the house for a showing, and the people came over twenty minutes early, and didn't stay on the property more then five minutes. It felt like a lot of wasted effort. I'm pretty sure they were just curious about the inside, not even really interested to start with! It irks me more then just a little bit. I digress. Back to dancing, something that I wish for more every time I get upset. I loved the showcase at the end of the year, I loved the fact that I was in all but two of the numbers, more than anybody else. I loved that I helped with almost every part of it. In short, I loved being the center of attention. I really want that again, the feeling of being good at something. I want to be in the spotlight, so maybe that's why I picked the background I picked, maybe that's why I write at all, maybe that's why I listen to other people's problems, maybe that's why I work so hard to be there for everyone. I want that millisecond of attention. Who knows why I want it, human nature, to many siblings, not enough siblings, I don't know. but I know what I want to do. I want to get as good as I can at dance, maybe good enough for a scholarship. I want to go to college, get a degree in dance, and then teach my way through psychology graduate school. Because I want that attention, but I also want to help. Maybe I'll want something else in a year, I don't know, but not knowing is part of being a teenager right? For now, I want to dance, and teach, and choreograph, but I like listening, and helping and being able to say they wouldn't have made it there without me, I don't think I can truly say that yet, but maybe someday...

SUMMER IS HERE! (sort of)

It's been awhile since I've writen anything, but since it annoys me to no end when someone apologizes for something like that, I'm not going to. Where to start though? How about with the things that made my life to busy to worry about blogging? First there was my dance showcase, then Finals week. After all that, graduation, parties, and then, oh right oh could I forget this, being grounded. Don't get me wrong, I don't enjoy being grounded in the least, but it wasn't so bad this time because I had girls camp most of the first week, and a family vacation to Sand Hollow the next. Like I said, not to bad a grounding. When I got home though, I was still grounded for a couple days until, dadada! the weekend! I watched Harry Potter 7 part one for the first time squished on a two person couch with a few of my friends while a couple others sat on the other couch and laughed at us, HArry Potter had to wait however when Cedar Hills started lighting off FIREWORKS!!!! (Ilovethosethings!!!) and then we went back to Harry Potter, on a tv that had mood swings.... greatest thing ever! half of everybody ended up asleep at one point or another though. Until... the SNAKE! as anybody ever told Voldemort he won't be getting many friends having a pet snake that kills old ladies? Somebody might want to shoot him an email. Monday my parents left on a cruise, and even though my sister and her husband are here after work each day, guess who babysits the rest of the time? Your's truely. I honestly don't mind my family, they're fun to be around sometimes, but I have cabin fever so bad this week. I'm so glad my parents are on their way back from the airport right now, I want to be out of the house.

Thank You Seminary Teachers

These last few weeks have been very hard. My temporary little brother is in the hospital again. I am in my Junior year of high school and am trying to figure out which colleges to send my ACT scores to. I'm taking an ACT prep class. I have all Honors classes thanks to the fact that my high school doesn't offer anything less than honors. I have no part of my body that's in alignment with the rest. I've been doing yoga in Fit for Life, and can't even do the parts that require me to lay flat on my back, because my body is in to much pain to lay flat. I can't sleep without strange unsettling dreams, or replays of the worst parts of my life thus far. (not yet in my twenties, I doubt life "could never get harder than this!" and I'm OK with that) I have a strange guy at school who will not take the hint and leave me alone, and even went so far yesterday as to hug me after I had clearly said no you may not hug me. To add to all this, my parents want to list our house to sell by this Saturday. Headaches are normal for me, not having one is very strange, but lately it's not having migraines that's strange. I have seen my dad hardly at all over the last couple weeks, and never when he has time. The highlight of my day are the last two of my eight classes each day: Seminary and Ballroom. I love music with my entire being. Seminary is the only way I get through the day. Today I couldn't take everything anymore, so I walked out to the seminary building during lunch, and asked my Seminary teacher to give me a blessing, he grabbed one of the other seminary teachers and though neither of them had oil, they gave me a blessing of comfort and peace. I'm not scared to sleep tonight, and I'm pretty sure I can make it through the end of the school year without my brain exploding. Thank you so much dear seminary teachers all over!

Strangest Tan Lines Ever!

I went to an AMAZING competition last night! Ballroom nationals at BYU Provo = WONDIFEROUS. I had to get up early today despite the fact that I didn't have school, and ended up at my ACT Prep class from 9 to 12:15, when I got home it was warm outside and I had homework to do. since I didn't have the money to go to Nationals again today, I decided to do homework outside on my tramp after I took a shower. I had shorts on and a cao sleeve shirt. I have a sunburn all the way from my left heel to the top of the back of my left thigh, and one on the inside of my right leg from my ankle to the top of my thigh. I also have a sunburn on the left side of my face. you may ask how I got sunburnt in such strange places, I fell asleep on my text book at noon, that's how. randomly enough though, only the back of my left thigh and my cheek hurt.

Life, Love, and Muscled Limph nodes?!?

So life, I't pretty good in all, I went on my second official date, and had a blast! Love, I LOVE my boyfriend to pieces! he is SO adorably cute! Muscled limph nodes?!? well here's the lowdown, Sunday (the day after my date) I was sitting in church, and I rest my chin on my hand while I'm listening, and there is a very sore lump under the right side of my chin! I was confused, but my limph nodes swelling isn't earth shatering. So I go to my parents house and have my mom look at it, she says it's fine, so I go to school the next day like normal. The lump gets a little bigger, but not much. That night it's hurting, so I have my mom look at it again, again she says it's fine and I probably have a toothache or a sorethroat that brought it on. The problem with that theory is that I haven't had a sore throat, and my teeth don't ache, or even tickle. The next morning my parents are at the hospital all day with a sibling sporting a high fever and random pains. The lump get substantially bigger, and is now a hard lump somewhere inbetween the size of a very large cherry, or a smallish golf ball. when I get home from school my dear mother, who had been up for over 48 hours, was sleeping and I was rather uninclined to wake her, so my older sister wrote a note telling my mom how worried she was about my lump. Before heading back to the hospital thismorning, she came into my room to check on me. she turned on my lamp, pointed it directly at my face and proceeded to poke my neck to find the darn thing. It had decreesed in size to about the size of a Costco cherry (the biggish kind) so she had me check and make sure my back teeth aren't infected, then she looks down my throat for inflemation, there was nothing abnormal with either, so I go to school with the lump still a mystery. It's almost smaller than a normal cherry now, and I'm hoping this means I won't have to have it checked by anyone besides my mom.

dot dot dot time

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaGZe1IorJY&feature=bf_next&list=QL&index=3 hehehe I'm REALLY in the Depths of Bordom at this point in time... XP Starcraft is interesting at this point, but still boring. I really think things should be more interesting. I want to watch an action movie randomly, which is weird because I normally hate action movies, but there you go...

The Continuation of Living is Sometimes Joyful

So I'm happy right now. I was not in a very wonderiferious mood today, but then I went and spent time with my Boyfriend (which I haven't done in awhile) and it was a ton of fun! I played Risk for the first time, and almost got all of Asia! (my bf still had two areas in Asia) but the other two people we were playing dominated the bored, they were sharing Africa, but one of them had Europe, and the other had BOTH Americas... then we played a huge game of Mafia, I LOVE that game with a passion! but now I'm home again, and sorta kinda bored... A well, I might go to a dance tonight, or watch the third Anne of Green Gables movie.... either way, I'm gonna have a TON of FUN!!!!